Families of fallen service members · ASPEKT

The marriage was not registered

You lived together for years, raised children, ran a household together — and on paper you are nobody to each other. That is how it looks to the authority making the decision.

This is put right through the courts. But first let us work out which circumstance applies to you, because these are two different cases.

We lived together as one family A shared home, a shared budget, children together. The marriage was not registered I was financially dependent on the deceased A mother, a father, a child or another person whom the deceased supported

You do not need to prove both circumstances at once. The one that actually existed is enough.

Living together as one family

The court establishes the fact that a man and a woman lived together as one family without registering a marriage. This is not a formality for the sake of paperwork: it is exactly this fact that gives the right to the payment on an equal footing with a wife or husband.

What proves the case

Not words, but the evidence taken together. One piece is not enough, but each one adds:

children together — the strongest evidence;
a shared home: a tenancy agreement, registered address, utility bills in both names;
shared expenses: loans, large purchases, transfers to each other;
photographs and messages over years, not over the last month;
witnesses — neighbours, relatives, colleagues, brothers-in-arms;
documents in which you named each other as a close person or emergency contact: hospital records, service records, parcel documents.

Why courts refuse

The most common reason is testimony from relatives alone, without a single document. A court is not obliged to take even sincere people at their word.

The second reason is gaps in living together that nobody explained. Service, work abroad, medical treatment — all of this is normal if it is stated and confirmed, and it ruins the case if it is kept silent.

That is why such a case must be prepared in advance, rather than approached as “let’s file and see”. Reversing an adverse court outcome is much harder than submitting a fully prepared case from the outset.

Financial dependency

This is a different situation. Here it does not matter whether you were married: what matters is that the deceased supported you, and that this support was your main source of livelihood.

Most often this concerns:

a mother or father to whom their son sent money and who could not support themselves;
a child, including a partner’s child from another relationship;
a person who could not work because of age or health.

What proves the case

transfers — regular, not one-off;
living together, or payment for housing, medicines, treatment;
the size of your own income — a pension or benefit — against which it is clear what you actually lived on;
testimony from those who saw it every day.

The key word is regularity. Occasional help is not considered financial dependency, and that is where most refusals begin.

What we do

1. We assess what there is We tell you honestly whether what has been collected is enough, and what else needs to be found.

2. We collect evidence Bank statements, documents from the place of service, medical and utility papers — with advocate’s requests.

3. We prepare witnesses We do not teach them what to say; we explain what the court will ask about. People often talk about things that do not matter.

4. We represent you in court Your presence is usually not needed.

5. With the judgment — back to the payment The fact established by the court becomes the basis for an application or for challenging a refusal.

What it costs

No advance payment. The fee is 15 percent of the amount granted to you, and only if the payment actually arrives. The firm covers the court fee and other expenses. Details are in the section “What it costs”.

The outcome of every case depends on its circumstances and evidence. Nothing on this page is a promise or guarantee of any particular result.

Describe your situation Back to the main page